the Different Faces of Love

 

Image courtesy: Jitu Savlani

Marriage, live-in, long-distance or open relationships, love has many faces. It can come in shades of black, white or even grey. But what makes love unique is the story that unites two people. This Valentine’s Day, iDiva gets in conversation with three distinct couples who share with us their perception of love

Karnvir Bohra and Teejay, Actors
Married for 3 years

Love is black and white, never grey
Teejay: it's clarity, like bright white light. Even when it’s black, it’ll always lead to white, because there’s always a lesson to draw from the bad times.
Karnvir: Be truthful. It solves all your problems; it goes a long way in love.

First meeting
Karnvir: It was at Mount Mary Church. My friend Anupama (Verma) took me to this church one day, after which I visited it often. Then, one fine day Anupama introduced to me TJ, who’d come to the church, but soon left, leaving us there together. We sat by the steps and chatted for hours.
Teejay: After that day, we’d exchange glances here and there at our common gym, but nothing happened. We met again at a photo exhibition, where he asked me out. I had a certain perception of how actors are, but he was very sincere and persistent; so I knew I was important to him.

You love, you hate
Karnvir: I even like the things I dislike about her. For instance, anyone else would dislike mood swings. She’d get upset over the smallest things. But when she gets irritated, I just look at her and we burst into laughter. We never stay upset for long. What I love about her is that she puts everyone else before her. It makes her so much more lovable.
Teejay: (smiling) I really dislike it when he asks me to do a dozen things and expects them all to be done at once. How am I to do that?
Karnvir: Aww, you’re getting better though (laughs)
Teejay: But I think the best thing about him is his capacity to love. I’m the centre of his world and I think every woman needs that.

Your relationship mantra
Teejay: I told him that if you agree that I’m always right, our relationship will always work.
Karnvir: And it does! (smiles)
Teejay: There are times when I know I’m wrong, but still he happily keeps the peace. I love him for that. 
Karnvir: When you look at the bigger picture, you realise that these small things really don’t matter.

—As told to Ruchika Vyas

Vipasha, Model and Vishesh Verma, Photographer
Married for 2 years

Love is black and white, never grey
Vishesh: I believe that either you love someone or you don’t; there is no middle ground.
Vipasha: Love can’t be black or white! It is pink and red and happy colours!

First meeting
Vishesh: Elite Model Management called me and said that a new model wants her portfolio done and asked me to check her picture on the website. They were raw pictures taken in college and I disliked them. She looked too round and the rawness was too unrefined for the camera.
Vipasha: He thought I was fat then! I was much thinner than what I am now.
Vishesh: But when we met for the shoot, I felt intrigued by her and my sister prodded me to meet her for coffee. I think that was the best date ever!

All in a moment
Vishesh: We were shooting at Benares where we stayed at her house. For the first time, I saw her interact with her family. That was her true essence; where she came from and where she belonged. I think it was in that moment I knew she was the one.
Vipasha: He was my first boyfriend and I knew he was the one when we started dating.

You love, you hate
Vishesh: I love her sense of humour; she had me at it. But I really dislike her laziness!
Vipasha: I love everything about him.
Vishesh: My raw sex appeal (laughs)
Vipasha: Yeah, I love that too! (smiles)

Your relationship mantra
Vishesh: She makes our relationship work; I just take cues from her.
Vipasha: Both of us make it work. Little compromises, listening to each other and yet having our own space is important to make things work. Oh, and good food for the man always works! (winks)

—As told to Disha Waghani

Falguni and Shane Peacock, Fashion designers
Married for 10 years

Love is black and white, never grey
Shane: Nothing can be black and white. There are ifs, buts, ups and downs. It’s not stark; there are always shades of grey.
Falguni: I agree. It can never be this or that. It’s a merging of both sides.

First meeting
Falguni: We met about 12 years ago through work.
Shane: I met her for a collection I wanted to do. We worked on that together and soon after, we teamed up because we worked so well together.

You love, you hate
Falguni: He is possibly the most patient person I know and he lets me be who I want to. But, sometimes if I nudge him, and he loses his patience it’s not fun at all!
Shane: She is one person who understands all her responsibilities and delivers each of them. But she also reminds you about your own (smiles)

Your relationship mantra
Shane: I would imagine that it’s different with us as opposed to other couples because we are together 24/7, at home and at work. In such a situation, space is important. There’s an unsaid understanding about her turf and mine. There are no hard and fast rules, just the understanding that comes with time. And if we need each other’s help, we just ask.
Falguni: Nothing is effortless, so we definitely work at our relationship. Because of our strong friendship I feel like we can be more open to each other.

Working together
Shane: It gives us a dual perspective on everything. Whether it’s positive feedback or critique, you know that you will always have another point of view.
Falguni:  It’s tough balancing family, home and work, but I cannot imagine my life any other way.