Winning Over Your Mother in law
For most women, before taking that big plunge into marriage, their biggest fear is- Will my mother-in-law like me? Will she approve of her son’s choice? Here in India, where the institution of marriage is still considered a sacrosanct affair and choice of a partner still dictated by who the parents approve of, one’s relationship with the in-laws becomes all the more crucial. The situation gets a little out of hand if the man happens to harbour strong feelings against his wife and a tug-of-war starts between the girl and her mother-in-law. Here's how you can alleviate the monster-in-law pressure.
Early signals to look out for
- When your M.I.L (mother-in-law) starts spending more time with your husband than her own husband.
- When she barges into your room with some petty issue while you and your husband are in the middle of something important.
- Tries to dictate his choices (of food, clothes, habits etc) still.
- Cuts you short in front of him.
Non-verbal Signals
So is there anything that a girl can do to help alleviate the situation? Definitely, just follow these golden rules as your survival kit!
- Be pleasant and courteous to your in-laws, in spite of what they think of you. Remember the problem lies with your M.I.L and not you!
- Never point out anything negative about your M.I.L before your hubby…after all it’s his mother you are commenting on.
- Don’t go out of the way to please your M.I.L – remember it often backfires. So keep your communication minimal, unless she is forthcoming enough.
- Never let your ego get in the way. Under such circumstances a clash of egos is the worst fallout!
- Watch out for how much support you gain from your husband. When things turn sour, men often choose to ‘stay indifferent’. So if he loves you, he should speak for you too.
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